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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: xr1 who wrote (18890)	4/24/2001 6:51:51 PM
From: Kid Rock	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

i was thinking celery _________________________________ Two bees ran into each other. One asked the other how things were going. "Really bad," said the second bee. "The weather has been really wet and damp and there aren't any flowers or pollen, so I can't make any honey." "No problem," said the first bee. "Just fly down five blocks and turn left and keep going until you see all the cars. There's a Bar Mitzvah going on and there are all kinds of fresh flowers and fresh fruit." "Thanks for the tip," said the second bee and flew away. A few hours later the two bees ran into each other again and the first bee asked, "How'd it go?" "Fine," said the second bee. "It was everything you said it would be." "Uh, what's that thing on your head?" asked the first bee. "That's my yarmulka," said the second bee. "I didn't want them to think I was a wasp."

To: xr1 who wrote (18890)	4/24/2001 7:20:21 PM
From: Karen Lawrence	Respond to of 62549

I've taken that test before. The first time I said "carrot", but this time, I said "onion". lololololol

To: xr1 who wrote (18890)	4/24/2001 7:44:58 PM
From: PMS Witch	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

Cucumber

To: xr1 who wrote (18890)	4/26/2001 3:00:55 PM
From: Skeeter Bug	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

hin, i saw pms' cucumber answer and linked to this quiz. even though i saw "cucumber" and was predispositioned to cucumber carrot pushed cucumber out of the way. interesting.

To: xr1 who wrote (18890)	6/13/2001 8:34:52 PM
From: Goalie	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Gotta love those lawyers.... The Madam opened the brothel door to see a frail, elderly gentleman. "Can I help you?" the madam asked. "I want Natalie," the old man replied. "Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies, perhaps someone else..." "No, I must see Natalie." Just then Natalie appeared and announced to the old man that she charged $1,000 per visit. Without blinking, the man reached into his pocket and handed her ten $100 bills. The two went up to a room for an hour, whereupon the man calmly left. The next night he appeared again demanding to see Natalie. Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row and that there were no discounts...it was still $1,000 a visit. Again the old man took out the money and the two went up to the room. An hour later, he left. When he showed up the third consecutive night, no one could believe it. Again he handed Natalie the money and up to the room they went. At the end of the hour Natalie questioned the old man: "No one has ever used my services three nights in a row. Where are you from?" The old man replied, "I'm from Philadelphia." "Really?" replied Natalie. "I have family who lives there." "Yes, I know," said the old man. "Your father died, and I'm your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you this $3,000 in cash!