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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Karen Lawrence who wrote (22670)	2/27/2002 1:40:35 PM
From: Karen Lawrence	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Biblical Bumper Stickers Adam: "You are what you eat." Eve: "At least he doesn't compare me to his mother." Abraham: "I'm goin' not knowin'. " Noah: "Honk if you believe in treading water." Moses: "From a basket case to the promised land." Elizah: "When Jezebel ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." Balaam: "My other donkey talks!" At the Sinai desert: "Winding road next 40 years" At the Red Sea: "Caution! Subject to sudden flooding"

To: Karen Lawrence who wrote (22670)	2/27/2002 10:02:51 PM
From: sandintoes	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

I'm already for the flack I know I'll get from this one! I shave my legs, I sit down to pee. And I can justify any shopping spree. I can balance the checkbook, I can pump my own gas. Can talk to my friends, about the size of my ass. My beauty's a masterpiece, and yes, it takes long. At least I can admit, to others when I'm wrong. I don't drive in circles, at any cost. And I don't have a problem, admitting I'm lost. I never forget, an important date. You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late. I don't watch movies, with lots of gore. Don't need instant replay, to remember the score. I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch. And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch. Don't say to your friends, Oh yeah, I can get her. In your dreams, my dear, I can do better! Flowers are okay, But jewelry's best. Look at me you idiot... Not at my chest???? I don't have a problem, With Expressing my feelings. I know when you're lying, You look at the ceiling. DON'T call me a GIRL, a BABE or a CHICK. I am a WOMAN. Get it?, you DICK!?!