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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: David Lawrence who wrote (25744)	12/6/2002 5:45:38 PM
From: Barney	Respond to of 62549

Subject: FINALLY SOME TRUISMS FROM THE DR. Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft............... Today, it's called golf. ---------------------------------------------- Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.. ---------------------------------------------- The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. ---------------------------------------------- Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved. --------------------------------------------- How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are? ---------------------------------------------- When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra. --------------------------------------------- You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks. ---------------------------------------------- One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. ---------------------------------------------- One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been. ---------------------------------------------- Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. ----------------------------------------------- Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you. ---------------------------------------------- If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old. --------------------------------------------- First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper, then .... Oh my goodness you forgot to pull your zipper down! ---------------------------------------------- If you jog in a jogging suit, lounge in lounging pajamas, and smoke in a smoking jacket, WHY would anyone want to wear a windbreaker?? ---------------------------------------------- And best of all.... If I am "over the hill" I must have gotten to the top!