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Pastimes : My House -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Lazarus_Long who wrote (5240)	2/19/2003 4:06:00 PM
From: Poet	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 7689

Ummmmm, you want me to tell a joke? Not my forte. But I'll say this: OMD, I'm so sorry you're under the weather. PLEASE rest and know we're pulling for you (and won't trash this place)and want you to return soon.

To: Lazarus_Long who wrote (5240)	2/19/2003 4:15:55 PM
From: Wayne Rumball	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 7689

Well let's see...... A couple weeks ago I was at Mont Blanc skiing. I went into the ski center there to have my skis adjusted, and who do I see at the counter? Saddam Hussein and his brother. Man I was shocked. So Saddam is trying to tell the guy there something, but it seems their two versions of english are not compatible, so I helped out with the translation. So Saddam wants me to tell the guy that he wants the same ski instructer that him and his brother had last year. So I translate that, guy behind the counter wants the instructors name. Saddam doesn't remember it. Guy behind the counter wants to know if he can remember anything about the instructor, hair color, mustache, glasses, anything. Saddam says yes he remembers that the guy was wearing a red jacket, and there was a special emblem on the left breast side. Well guy at the counter huffs a bit and is starting to get annoyed "All the ski instructors wear that same jacket". So he wants to know if there is possibly anything else Saddam can remember. Saddam thinks for a moment, then says yes, there was one thing. The instructor had 2 anuses. I told him he must be confused, got his english words wrong. No no, he says, the instructor had 2 anuses, I remember very well, we were skiing with the instructor and stopped for a break, then this other instructor stopped by and asked him how it was going with those two assholes........

To: Lazarus_Long who wrote (5240)	2/19/2003 5:18:47 PM
From: Ish	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 7689

Cheap SOB shoudda spent the $7 and got a flu shot.

To: Lazarus_Long who wrote (5240)	2/19/2003 5:50:17 PM
From: Neenny	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 7689

Doesn't he know a good doctor???

To: Lazarus_Long who wrote (5240)	2/20/2003 1:16:13 PM
From: Original Mad Dog	Read Replies (4) \| Respond to of 7689

Laz, everyone, thanks for the good wishes and jokes..... And yes, Ish, I actually got my flu shot this year, not that it helped. (I am too cheap to buy it, but it's available to me for free at work.) I am sitting at my desk, sipping Wild Berry Zinger Herb Tea, which a good friend sent to me yesterday as a tonic for sore throats. So far it works. I've also lost ten more pounds in two weeks, and haven't eaten a meal in probably a week or so. I don't recommend this virus as a weight loss plan, but with a little marketing and a fancy name (the Dr. Dog Weight Loss Miracle!) it has possibilities..... Quick, Laz, come up with a business plan and I'll give you one percent of the profits.