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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: The Rabbit who wrote (28973)8/6/2003 9:13:35 PM
From: Jagfan  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62569
 
HER DIARY
Sunday night - I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.

Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent.

I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing."

I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving.

I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I love you, too."

When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.

He just sat there and watched TV.; he seemed distant and absent.

Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed and to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.

I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep.

I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep.

I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.

My life is a disaster.

HIS DIARY

Today the Mets lost, but at least I got laid.



To: The Rabbit who wrote (28973)8/8/2003 12:14:51 AM
From: Karen Lawrence  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62569
 
One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a
tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he
cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you
crying?" The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared
with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord again went down and came up with a silver
axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.

Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord went down again and came up with an iron
axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and
gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter
went home happy.

Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his
wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river.
When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him,
"Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up
with Jennifer Lopez. "Is this your wife?" the Lord
asked.

"Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a
misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to Jennifer
Lopez, You would have come up with Catherine Zeta-Jones.
Then if I also said 'no' to her, You would have come up with my wife. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given all three to me. Lord, I am a poor man, and I am not able to take care of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to Jennifer Lopez."

The moral of this story is: whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.