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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/24/2004 8:44:42 PM
From: Ish	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

<<Last week my brother called to tell me that his wife of thirty years hadn't awakened that morning.>> I can't even imagine how it him or you. Sorry for your loses.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/25/2004 1:03:54 AM
From: Crocodile	Respond to of 71178

"I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." -- Diane Ackerman It sounds as though Carole lived "the width" of life as well. It often seems that people who have experienced many losses possess a greater sense of the fleeting and fragile nature of life, and live according to that knowledge. I believe that, especially in our time, perhaps too many of us live as though we're immortal, putting off the things we should be doing right now -- not making enough time for fun and being with friends and family. Again, it sounds as though Carole made time for the things that counted most.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/25/2004 10:47:00 AM
From: Justin C	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

... my brother, who is lost without her. Penni, that's a very sad situation that so many people in my church singles group have talked about experiencing after becoming divorced or widowed. The good news is that time and supportive friends and family nearly always help them to eventually move on to a new life. Based on what you said about your brother's marriage and life in general, it sounds as if he has the "right stuff" to make it through this dark period. Having you in his remaining family has to be a big plus for him as well. :) Your reflections on the loss were beautifully written.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/25/2004 1:13:17 PM
From: Lady Lurksalot	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

Rambi, My heartfelt sympathies to you and your family for your loss. If there is anything I can do, please let me know. Sincerely, Holly

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/25/2004 5:30:36 PM
From: carranza2	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

Sorry for your loss. Your sister-in-law sounds like a wonderful person. What a shame that she died so young.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/25/2004 11:09:24 PM
From: JF Quinnelly	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 71178

Penni, I'm very sorry to hear of your family's loss. The little platoon we take through life gets smaller, and shared memories become ours alone.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/27/2004 1:54:14 PM
From: Jacques Chitte	Respond to of 71178

Rambi, I am very sorry to hear that someone so close to you has passed away. Also please pass on my sympathies to your brother. from the real person behind LRR

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	10/28/2004 2:32:52 AM
From: KLP	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

I'm so sorry to hear of your and your family's loss, Rambi. What a wonderful tribute: She never hesitated about life. And isn't it wonderful she didn't- and that she took my brother along with her on the ride.

To: Rambi who wrote (65622)	11/4/2004 5:41:26 AM
From: Maurice Winn	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 71178

<when your parents die, there is a feeling of a protective line between you and death falling away. and there you are - now the grown-up- facing death and its army of terminal weapons straight on, and standing in front of your own children. Then the person next to you falls, and you realize, damn, they've started shooting.> That's how I felt too. Having had two children at serious risk of being dead from cancer, <she said, after you lose a child, there is nothing left to be afraid of. > I don't think I'd want to outlive any of my offspring. People dying seems such a waste. We spend decades learning how things work, not knowing it all, but getting to know more of our way around the maze and understanding the operating system, only to be tossed in the recycling bin. I suppose humans can live a long time because over thousands of years, the waste of people dying young pushed evolution to have us stick around longer. But it's still not long enough. I always feel robbed of the people who have died. Each death leaves a permanent hole, with memories rattling around, increasingly, as jfred says, to be rattling only in our own minds if we live long enough and all we knew has gone. Then maybe it's time to go. But then, who would be first? Thanks for telling us Penni. Mqurice [Catching up having come from the scary Halloween "jumping out" picture - which made the hair stand up on me even though I was ready. I've never been one for scary stuff. The real thing is almost prosaic by comparison - just don't wake up one day, or even in an accident perhaps don't have time to think or be scared; strange] PS: Here's Jake, born 2 November = my brother's first grandchild and first of that generation for my siblings [Tarken is our son in Japan, who didn't die from lymphoma, and he put the photos there - click to enlarge] blog.livedoor.jp