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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Shawn M. Downey who wrote (3847)	11/9/1997 3:24:00 PM
From: Chartgod	Respond to of 62558

Good one Shawn!! We're getting better here.. :) I've got to get mine up... james

To: Shawn M. Downey who wrote (3847)	11/9/1997 9:24:00 PM
From: Chartgod	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

MORAL OF THE STORY One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then end it with a moral. The following day the teacher asks for a volunteer. Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. One Sunday, we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket & onto the road." When the teacher asked for the moral of the story, Suzy replied, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket." Next is little Lucy. "Well my dad owns a farm too, and every week we put the chicken eggs into the incubator. Last week only 8 of 12 eggs hatched." The teacher asked for the moral of the story, and Lucy replied, "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched." "Wonderful!" exclaims the teacher. Last is little Johnny. "My Uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, and his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer, and unfortunately landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with the machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. Then the blade on the machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands." The teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story. "Sure. Don't screw around with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking."

To: Shawn M. Downey who wrote (3847)	11/10/1997 9:22:00 PM
From: Chartgod	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

Shawn, in keeping up with you: An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is." While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24 year old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your Mother."