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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Cheeky Kid who wrote (4561)	1/29/1998 4:31:00 AM
From: Anthony Graham Poyser	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

Here are some jokes.... I hope they're new, but for all I know they might have come from this very site! > Men are like vacations: > They never seem to be long enough > > Men are like computers: > Hard to figure out and never have enough memory > > Men are like coolers: > Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere > > Men are like chocolate bars: > Sweet, smooth, and they usually head straight for your hips > > Men are like coffee: > The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long > > Men are like horoscopes: > They always tell you what to do and they are usually wrong > > Men are like plungers: > They spend most of their time in a hardware store or the bathroom > > Men are like cement: > After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard > > Men are like snowstorms: > You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it will > > last > > Men are like parking spots: > The good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped > > Why is it hard for women to find men who are sensitive, > caring and good looking? > Because those men already have boyfriends A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren, and last night I had an affair. I made love to two 18 year old girls. Both of them. Twice." The priest said: "Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?" "Never Father. I don't belong to your church." "So then, why are you telling me?" "You kidding? I'm telling everybody!" A father and his son were grocery shopping when they came across a great display of condoms. The son asks his father, "Dad, what's the three pack for?" His father replies, "That's for when you're in high school: two for Friday night - one for Saturday night." The son asks, "What's the six pack for, Daddy?" Dad replies, "That's for when you're in college: two for Friday night two for Saturday night - two for Sunday morning." Then the son asks, "What's the 12 pack for?" "That's for when you're married... One for January, one for February, one for March.................