Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: John Messbauer who wrote (4920)	3/10/1998 7:46:00 PM
From: Steve LaRiviere	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

A businessman was sent to Japan for a business meeting. After he arrives at the hotel he checks into his room, goes down to the lounge for dinner and spotting a Japanese hooker at the bar, picks her up and takes her to his room. She can't speak English and he can't speak Japanese, but they both understand the language of love and they are soon having wild sex on the bed. All during the act, the hooker keeps screaming "Mashi-eechi, mashi-eechi!!!" The businessman thinks to himself 'This here hooker probably never had an American stud, why, these Japanese men are probably little everywhere. This hooker should be paying me!!!' He then finishes, and the hooker quickly gets up, dresses, grabs the money on the dresser and runs out the door. The businessman falls asleep. The next day, the business goes to the Japanese plant, meets the president, who then tells him that it is his custom to only talk business during a round of golf. 'Great' the businessman thinks to himself and soon they are at the golf course. At the first hole, the president takes perfect stance, hits the ball which then take a perfect trajectory, bounces a few times, then rolls right to the hole and dips in, making a hole in one. Wanting to impress his Japanese host, the businessman starts jumping up and down screaming "Mashi-eechi, mashi-eechi, mashi-eechi!!!" The president looks at him, puzzled, and says "What the hell do you mean, wrong hole?"

To: John Messbauer who wrote (4920)	3/10/1998 7:56:00 PM
From: codydog	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

A 7 year old boy and his 4 year old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. The 7 year old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7 year old says, "When we go down stairs for breakfast this morning, I'll say "Hell" and you say "ass." The 4 year old happily agrees. As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their Mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7 year old replies, "Ah hell, mom, I'll just have some Cheerios." "WHACK!" The surprised mother reacts quickly. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner voice, the mother then asks the younger son, "And what would YOU like for breakfast?" "I don't know," the 4 year old blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it's not gonna be Cheerios."

To: John Messbauer who wrote (4920)	3/11/1998 12:33:00 AM
From: bob	Respond to of 62549

A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth. Turning to the man next to him he said, "I forgot my teeth." The man said, "No problem." With that he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of false teeth. "Try these," he said. The speaker tried them. "Too loose," he said. The man then said, "I have another pair...try these." The speaker tried them and responded, "Too tight." The man was not taken back at all. He then said, "I have one more pair...try them." The speaker said, "They fit perfectly." With that he ate his meal and gave his address. After the dinner meeting was over, the speaker went over to thank the man who had helped him. "I want to thank you for coming to my aid. Where is your office? I've been looking for a good dentist." The man replied, "I'm not a dentist. I'm the local undertaker."