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Politics : Did Slick Boink Monica? -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Mitchell who wrote (18424)	8/20/1998 9:21:00 AM
From: Richnorth	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 20981

From theeunderground.net. Could the interviewer Mai Sugob be Linda Tripp? BTW Sugob is the reverse of boguS and Mai is the reverse of i aM. _________________________________________________________________ The Monica Interview Monica Speaks Thee Under Ground Net 8/19/98 Interview with Monica. This interview was conducted through an arrangement by a mutual friend. Mai Sugob was the Interviewer, a free lance reporter. Mai: Monica, why after all this time are you breaking your silence? Monica: Well Mai, I have finally gotten immunity from Ken, so I can now set the record straight. I'm just so sick of all the lies about me in the media and especially on the Internet. Imagine Matt Drudge lying about my beautiful navy cocktail dress. The GAP, come on give me a break. I don't shop at the GAP. Did you know Matt Drudge is a fag? My friends in Beverly Hills see him all the time in gay clubs. I hear he really sucks cock very good. Mai: Hmmmm, well Monica where did you get the dress that has Presidential Deposits on it? Monica: SAKS of course. Mai: Oh, don't you just love that store? Monica: Yes it is a fav of mine too. Mai: Now Monica, can you tell us about whether you had sex with Bill? Monica: Of course I did. When I came to Washington it was with one thing on my mind. Presidential knee pads. I gave him the hummer of his life. At least 13 times over about 18 months. CAn you believe I actually put his crooked little pecker in my mouth and made him shoot like never before! He loved it when I rubbed his prostrate gland with my middle finger. He actually likes to have his anus penetrated with a tongue. Mai: Did you really do that? Monica: Of course not, I'm Jewish. I would just tell him as my finger did the job that it was my tongue. I don't eat asshole, not even Presidential ones. He is an ASSHOLE by the way. Did I tell you that. Pure fucking asshole. It was a one way relationship with that crooked little prick. He never licked my you know what once. Even though he would say he would all the time on the phone. Then I would run over to the House late at night after a great phone sex session, to only end up giving him a BJ. He never took care of my needs. What a PRICK! Heck when Ken asked me what Cunnilingus was on the stand, I didn't even know what the term meant. Why can't lawyers just say, "Did he eat your pussy?" Mai: So Bill didn't eat your vagina? Monica: No that crooked little prick wouldn't even smell it, let alone eat it. He used to talk about me getting a girlfriend to eat it in front of him in the Oval or Orifice Office as he likes to call it. It was one his favorite themes in our phone sex talks. He loves to talk about women eating each other. He told me Hillary is a lesbian, that is why he cheats on her. Pure dyke that stone cold bitch. I remember one time I was sucking him while he was on the phone with Dick. The conversation was about Hillary staying in Los Angeles so much so she could dyke with stars like Julia Roberts. Mai: Really! Monica: Yes, everyone knows Hillary is a dyke that can't stand the thought of sex with Bill, so he gets to screw around with whoever he wants. But he doesn't have intercourse. Something about the Bible. Mai: Hmmmmm. Now tell me Monica, did Bill wear a tie given to him by you on Television the other night? Monica: No way. All the gifts I gave him were subpoenaed in the Jones case. What a trailer park slut that bitch is. About time she got that nose redone. I don't even see how she could suck a person off with that nose in the way. I never understood what Bill saw in that witch. Mai: Did you discuss the Jones case with Bill? Monica: Of course. All the time. Bill was really pissed the Supreme Court allowed that trailer park scum to sue a sitting President. When her lawyers found out I was his mistress, they tried to get me to talk. So Bill explained that since we didn't have Intercourse we really didn't have SEX. Just like how he DIDN'T INHALE. Isn't he so INTELLIGENT. Playing with words like that. Mai: So Bill did explain to you EXACTLY HOW TO WORD your affidavit in the Paula Jones case? Monica: Yes, he told me it isn't LYING, just legally hiding the TRUTH. Lawyers do it all the time. Isn't he so INTELLIGENT. Mai: So Monica do you still surf the web? Monica: I'm trying to, but my computer was taken by Ken. So, I lost all my good bookmarks. My attorneys gave me a laptop to surf the web though. Since I have nothing to do most days. Hiding out from the media is just so boring. I love to read the death prophecies about Bill from Sollog. You know I learned of Sollog from Bill. The government reads his prophecies all the time to find out what will happen to them. Did you know he told a judge the exact day Bill will die. He also told the judge all about TWA 800 and Diana's death before it occurred. I think the government is covering up all his prophecies. Some in the Presidents inner circle think Sollog is really God, and he's come to punish mankind and Bill. Mai: Hmmmmmmmm. Monica: Do you know about Sollog? Mai: Yes I read Thee Under Ground Net. Now Monica, did Bill ever tell you to lie or obstruct justice by hiding his gifts to you? Monica: Well he never called it lying or hiding. He explained our private lives were private and that since the Jones case was politically motivated it was okay to not be fully truthful. By saying we didn't have SEX, it wasn't a lie because we never had INTERCOURSE. By me returning his cheap presents to Betty, I wasn't hiding them, I was merely entrusting them to her for SAFEKEEPING. Isn't he so INTELLIGENT? Mai: Well Monica, is there anything you want to say to the US and World? Monica: Yes. I don't buy dresses from the Gap, and that ugly tie he wore the other night during his "I had an affair with Monica speech", was not a tie that I gave him. I have better taste than that tie. I think Chelsea gave him that ugly tie. Isn't she a mutt. Bad genes I think. Too many cousins doing each other in Arkansas. Mai: Hmmmm. Is there anything else. Monica: Yes. I don't do rim jobs even for Presidents. But I do swallow. Mai: Well thank you Monica for setting the record straight.