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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Jeff who wrote (7577)	11/2/1998 3:43:00 PM
From: dougb 1	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62551

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis From Jack Handey's Deep Thoughts But I still like LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE..TELL US A JOKE!

To: Jeff who wrote (7577)	11/2/1998 8:37:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62551

Why don't witches wear panties? So that they can get a good grip on the broom... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Why do men pay more than women for car insurance? A. Because women don't get blow jobs while they're driving. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Warning This Is A Goan--er An Italian, and Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping", To the Irishman he says "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "you're in charge of supplies". He then says "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile." So the foreman goes away for a couple hours, and when he returns, the pile of sand is untouched. He says to the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I didn't have a broom. You said the Chinese a guy was in a charge of supplies, but he a disappeared and I couldn't a find a him." Then the foreman turns to the Irishman and asks why he didn't shovel. The Irishman replies in his heavy brogue, "Aye, ye did lad. But I counna get meself a shovel. Ye left the chinese guy in chairge of supplies, but I counna fin' him." The foreman is really angry now, and storms off toward the pile of sand looking for the Chinese guy... Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of sand and yells.... "SUPPLIES!"

To: Jeff who wrote (7577)	11/4/1998 8:49:00 PM
From: Mick	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62551

There has been only one time that I laughed so hard on this thread. Its gems like these that make wading through so many lame duck posts worth while. Thanks

To: Jeff who wrote (7577)	11/5/1998 10:09:00 PM
From: george wood	Respond to of 62551

The Hamster and the Frog --- A mangy looking guy who goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says: "No way. I don't think you can pay for it." The guy says, "You're right. I don't have any money, but if I show you something you haven't seen before, will you give me a drink?" The bartender says, "Only if what you show me ain't risque." "Deal!" says the guy and reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the hamster on the bar and it runs to the end of the bar, down the bar, across the room, up the piano, jumps on the key board and starts playing Gershwin songs. And the hamster is really good. The bartender says, "You're right. I've never seen anything like that before. That hamster is truly good on the piano." The guy downs the drink and asks the bartender for another. "Money or another miracle else no drink", says the bartender. The guy reaches into his coat again and pulls out a frog. He puts the frog on the bar, and the frog starts to sing. He has a marvelous voice and great pitch. A fine singer. A stranger from the other end of the bar runs over to the guy and offers him $300 for the frog. The guy says "It's a deal." He takes the three hundred and gives the stranger the frog. The stranger runs out of the bar. The bartender says to the guy "Are you some kind of nut? You sold a singing frog for $300? It must have been worth millions. You must be crazy." "Not so", says the guy. "The hamster is also a ventriloquist."