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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SJS who wrote (8133)	12/18/1998 2:14:00 PM
From: Neenny	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

WHY YOU CANNOT TRUST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal band used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated: Wash Biol Surv Untile the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: "Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible." The bands are now marked. "Fish and Wildlife Service."

To: SJS who wrote (8133)	12/19/1998 9:30:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

The night before Christmas, a family went to sleep when they were startled awake by an explosion. They went outside and saw the outside toilet in a million pieces - with Santa in the rubble. He was shaking his fist at a sleigh encircling him in the air while he shouted, "You idiots! I said the SCHMIDT house!!" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Three days after Christmas a woman asked the hardware store clerk, "Do you have any batteries?" "Yes." The clerk gestures with his finger. "Can you come this way?" "If I could come that way," the woman answered, "I wouldn't need the batteries."