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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: BamaReb who wrote (8481)1/18/1999 7:11:00 PM
From: jbIII  Respond to of 62549
 
more gratifying to tell Scharf to stick
it up his ***.


A lot funnier too !!<gg>



To: BamaReb who wrote (8481)1/19/1999 9:00:00 PM
From: John Messbauer  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62549
 
A young lady in the maternity ward, just prior to labor, is asked by the
midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth.

"I'm afraid I don't have a husband", she replies.

"O.K. do you have a boyfriend?", asks the Midwife.

"No, no boyfriend either."

"Do you have a partner then?"

"No, I'm unattached, I'll be having the baby on my own."

After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman.

"You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see
her that the baby is black."

"Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and
nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a Porno movie. The lead man was
black."

"Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my business
and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions but I must
also tell you that the baby has blonde hair."

"Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the money
and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what else could
I do?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my business
and I hate to pry further but your baby has slanted eyes."

"Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was a
little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice."

At this the midwife again apologizes collects the baby and presents her to
the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the rear. The
baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Well thank God for that!"

"What do you mean?!" says the midwife, shocked.

"Well," says the girl extremely relieved, "I had this horrible feeling that
she was going to bark."
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Starr: "Monica says you have a small penis"

Clinton: "Monica has a big mouth"