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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Patrick who wrote (8679)	2/12/1999 10:43:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

Let's get back to the jokes- Here's 1. Fred mistakenly gets on a bus full of war veterans, but upon discovering it is going his way, decides to stay on for the ride. He sits down next to a guy that jerks his head to the left every few seconds, over and over. This really starts to get on Fred's nerves so he asks him, "What the heck is wrong with you?" The reply is, "l got this in the war." Fred finds this pretty annoying so he switches seats. The next guy he sits by has uncontrollable spastic twitches in his right leg, causing him to kick the seat in front of him, and even kicks Fred a few times. So Fred asks him, "What the heck is wrong with you?" Again the answer is, "l got this in the war." Fred moves. The next guy poor Fred sits by begins erratically flailing his left hand. Fred says, "Let me guess, you got that in the war." His reply was, "No, l got it out of my nose. l can't get it off of my hand."

To: Patrick who wrote (8679)	2/25/1999 11:57:00 AM
From: I Know Nada	Respond to of 62549

In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the latest mergers we can expect to see: Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker. 3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood. John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da. Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home. Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine, All Mine. Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women merge to become Knott NOW