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Pastimes : Jokes -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (1888)	3/30/1999 8:33:00 PM
From: treetopflier	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 2733

Yukon Lil One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into a saloon. "I'm lookin' for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in Fairbanks!" he said to the bartender. "We got her!" replied the barkeep. "She's Yukon Lil, upstairs in the second room on the right." The miner handed the bartender a gold nugget to pay for the Lil and two beers. He grabbed the bottles, stomped up the stairs, kicked open the second door on the right and yelled, "I'm lookin' for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in Fairbanks!" The woman inside the room looked at the miner and said, "You found her! I'm called Yukon Lil." Then she stripped naked, bent over, and grabbed her ankles. "How do you know I want to do it in that position?" asked the miner. "I don't," replied the whore, "but I thought you might like to open them beers first." ttf

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (1888)	3/31/1999 9:24:00 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 2733

awwww...poor guy... The elderly man was at home, upstairs dying in bed. He smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies baking. He wanted one last cookie before he died. He fell out of bed, crawled to the landing, rolled down the stairs and crawled into the kitchen where his wife was busily baking cookies. With his last remaining strength he crawled to the table and was just barely able to lift his withered arm to the cookie sheet. As he grasped a warm, moist, chocolate chip cookie, his favorite kind, his wife suddenly whacked his hand with a spatula. Why? he whispered, Why did you do that? "They're for the funeral.", she replied.