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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: JakeStraw who wrote (10924)	8/5/1999 9:47:00 AM
From: SIer formerly known as Joe B.	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 62549

Another stolen mummy returned to northern Philippine province LA TRINIDAD, Philippines, Aug 05, 1999 (AP Worldstream via COMTEX) -- Philippine museum officials returned Thursday a centuries-old mummy to a northern mountain province from which many mummified remains of ancient tribesmen have been stolen. The mummy, wrapped in a red blanket, was turned over in La Trinidad town to Benguet Governor Raul Molintas. After the turnover, tribal elders butchered a pig, chicken and a dog in a ritual they said will help them determine where in Benguet the mummy came from. The mummy, estimated to be from 600 to 700 years old, is unusual because it is in an upright position and could be the tallest among Benguet mummies. Other mummies found there are usually in a sitting position and are smaller. Although the mummy has a remarkably intact face, with its wrinkles still discernible, its chest and other parts have deteriorated, said Orlando Abinion, a National Museum curator. Abinion said the mummy was turned over to the museum last week by an antique collector in Baguio, also in Benguet. Another Baguio antique collector is expected to return another mummy soon. ''There is now a growing awareness among the people to return these mummies,'' Abinion said. The collectors did not say how they acquired the mummies but said they decided to give them back after learning about the return of a well-known mummy, Apo Annu, in May to a Benguet cave from where it was stolen in 1918. After Apo Annu was returned, officials appealed to Philippine and foreign collectors to return other mummies stolen from Benguet. The mummies were undisturbed for centuries until they were discovered in the 1900s by loggers in the jungles of Benguet, about 230 kilometers (145 miles) north of Manila. Vandalism and theft became widespread in the 1970s. Last year, some of the caves were included in a list of the 100 most endangered historical sites by the World Monument Watch.

To: JakeStraw who wrote (10924)	8/5/1999 7:04:00 PM
From: Calvin Scott	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

A priest and a rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on train. After a while, the priest put down his book and opened a conversation by saying, "I know that, in your religion, you're not supposed to eat pork...but have you really never even tasted it?" The rabbi closed his newspaper and responded, "I must tell you the truth. Yes I have, on the odd occasion." The rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "I know that in your religion, you're supposed to be celibate... but..." The priest interjected, "Yes, I know what you are going to ask, and yes, I have succumbed to temptation once or twice." The two resumed their reading. There was silence for a while. Then the rabbi peeked around his newspaper and said, "Better than pork, isn't it?!"

To: JakeStraw who wrote (10924)	8/5/1999 7:23:00 PM
From: Peter S. Maroulis	Respond to of 62549

1. Who has the bravest men? -------------------------------------------------------------------- There was a meeting called for the highest ranking officers of all the armed forces of the United States.A heated discussion ensued about who had the bravest men. The General of the Army said "I have the Bravest men watch this, soldier get in here" "Sir, yes sir" with a snappy salute. "I want you to shoot yourself in the foot with this pistol" "Sir, yes sir" The soldier takes the pistol, points it at his foot, pulls the trigger and BANG - shoots himself right in the foot. "That will be all son, go see the Doctor" "Sir, yes sir" The General of the Marines said "That was pretty brave, but watch this! Marine front and center" "Sir, yes sir" with that springboard type of salute that only a Marine can give. The Marine General throws a live grenade into the corner and said: "Marine, you better save our lives." No questions asked, the Marine jumps on the grenade and is blown to smithereens. General Of The Air force said "That was pretty brave but come aboard my super airplane C5A and I'll show you brave" So everyone goes up into the wild blue yonder and when the airplane is about a 10,000 feet up in the Air the General yells "Airman Jump." "Sir, yes sir" No Chute, no question, the airman jumps and falls all the way back to earth and splats on the ground. The Admiral of the Navy said" that was pretty brave but come abroad my super Aircraft Carrier USS America and I'll show you brave" So everyone goes onboard the USS America, everyone is standing on the flight deck and the Admiral says "See that seaman way at the top of the mast shining brass? Watch this.. Seaman Jump" "Sir, get lost Sir" The Admiral turns around and said now that's brave!